Taking Chances

Two more finals…two more finals, and it is all over. Winter Quarter 2016. I mean, I will tell you something: as much as the Quarter System is stressful and fast-paced, I think I prefer it to semesters. Granted, my only comparison to semesters is High School, which I hated, but I like being able to take three different sets of classes a year, even if I get out for summer later than my Semester System friends.

This quarter has kind of been a whirlwind. Part of me thinks it is going on forever, but the other part is wondering how it can already be March, when just yesterday I was a senior in high school. It is so strange to look back at my memories from last year and think that Mads, Tori, and Kristin were not a part of them. They were not with me during the great Pretty Little Roomies adventures, and they did not know what went on during roomie recap. They did not get to see me jump out of windows.

But they did get to see me through dancing on tables. We have spent many late nights in each other’s apartments doing nothing but laughing. There was a weekend in the sun over Valentine’s Day. Three days in a row at our favorite frat satellite. Of course, this quarter has been much more low key in terms of dancing on tables, but that does not mean it was any less fun and exciting.

I almost do not want this quarter to end. I have loved my classes and had great professors. (Shout out to you, Pat Fitzhenry!). I feel like I have really taken control of my life and taken better care of myself this quarter. Maybe sometimes I took too good care of myself.

This quarter, I went out much less than last. I did have a bit of a hard quarter mentally, and I wanted to make sure I did not push myself in a way that would send me downhill. A lot of weekends were spent in my room with my Netflix or a good book. Or homework–I tried really hard to do better in school. But part of me thinks I was just playing it safe, not getting out of my comfort zone. I had thought that a frat party was becoming a place I was not afraid of. Looking back, I am thinking that I was wrong.

Fall Quarter, I went out a lot, but I went to the same house nearly every time. This quarter, I did not see much, of at all, of that house, and I think the prospect of branching out and having to talk to boys I didn’t know and using the bathroom every one else had to made me uneasy.

To be honest, I am not sure I regret playing it safe. It is not that I am afraid of getting drugged by a frat boy or anything (the media paints Greek Life in such a negative way), but it is more that spreading my wings is still hard. I mean, I am bummed that I missed out on one of my friends insisting to the other that she was going to punch her in the face or that I slept in too late to go to Popeye’s in the morning. But instead, I got to write a lot. I got to sit quietly in my little room and read a few good books and write chapter upon chapter of Book 2. Still, though, I wish that a few times I pushed myself a little further and went out with my friends.

I am learning more and more about myself and about life. Staying in helped me with that, but I think I would have learned a lot is I had gone out too. Maybe Spring Quarter will turn out like Fall. I am almost hoping so. I miss dancing on coffee tables to Sam Hunt. I will try to find a better balance between going out and staying in.

I don’t expect to figure out life anytime soon, but I am having fun trying. I never thought I would love life so much, and a part of me hopes I never figure it out completely.

-Ash

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