Sundaze – 4/10/2016

I’ve been thinking about so many things lately, and I just need to ramble a little bit more about them…

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My mind is on a few things: The Goldfinch, New York City, music, classes, housing.

I have to tell you, I cannot stop thinking about The Goldfinch. It is so very good so far that it is all I want to read. Every minute that I am not reading it, I wish I was snuggled up in my bed with it. I am still in the beginning of the story itself–Theo is still a young boy–but my mind is racing thinking about what is going to happen. I am quickly developing opinions about the characters and if I like them or not or if I trust them.

I cannot help but get attached to the characters in the books I read. One of my favorite authors, Ally Carter, does a really fabulous job of that. Meg Cabot, too. But as soon as I am finished with this post, I am curling up in my bed with the book.

And as always, New York is on my mind. I have been already looking at places just to get an idea of how much money I need to set aside for rent and what my budget will be for what I want.

I think about the days when I will be living in a tiny apartment and going to museums and parks on weekends and stuff. I want to look out a window at the concrete jungle of the city and write my days away. My heart beats a little faster whenever the idea plants itself in my mind. It has been growing and thriving like bamboo.

I do need some advice on which neighborhoods I should live in…Thoughts? Shoot me an email!

As always, music is my background noise. It has switched off between Hamilton and the Beatles, and not much else. I mean, when I walk to and from classes, I just play the music downloaded onto my phone, but whenever I sit down, I open my Spotify to my two saved playlists.

Music has aways just been such a huge part of my life. I wrote over a hundred songs in middle school. They became few and far between in high school and college, but I still pop out a personal gem once in a while. Listening to music is one of the only things that calms me.

Whenever I am sad or upset or happy or angry or any emotion, listening to music makes it all better. Cuddling my pillows with my twinkly lights on, blasting a song through my headphones…it blocks out the entire world, and it is the only time I like being alone with my thoughts. I guess because I am not really thinking about real life, I am thinking about the lyrics and the melody and the way the guitar plays off the piano or the drums. I pay such close attention to the harmonies or the key changes.

I can connect to music in a way I cannot connect to anything else–except writing and reading. I mean, there is a reason all my blog posts are song titles and the name of my blog is a lyric from a Hunter Hayes song.

Now that Spring Quarter has started, the stress is taking over again. I have two classes four days a week, so I am always doing homework for those, and sometimes I forget about my other two classes. There is so much reading and so many online quizzes and countless things I am trying to understand. It is already difficult to keep up, and we are only about to start Week 3!

I like the quarter system, I really do. I like taking all different kinds of classes and being able get rid of a professor after a fairly short time. When I am in the same routine for too long, I get a little antsy. But sometimes it is almost too fast-paced, and I get overwhelmed. I am determined to make it through, though. I can do this.

But the real bane of my existence right now is housing. We found this beautiful house that could fit all of us and, I am not going to sugarcoat it, it was basically perfect. Well, we made it to the top ten, then the top four, and then the final two…and the landlord chose the other group. I just need to know what they had that we did not because he told Kristin that we were pretty much the exact same group. So why them and not us? It is just extremely frustrating!

Now that we are essentially homeless, we are rapidly looking for a place to live. Luckily, Tori found a three bedroom that would fit the four of us very nicely, and it is close enough to campus. Hopefully this one works out. Pray for us, because I certainly am.

There are so many things to stress me out right now, and I am afraid that they are all going to peak at the same moment, pushing me into a bit of a downward spiral. Luckily, though, I have my books and my music to help me out. I am hoping that these will be enough to ease my mind when I really need it.

This is Sunday, my rest day. That is what I plan to do. Some homework, church with Michael, and reading. I already know that next week is going to be pretty hectic because it is Big/Little Week, which therefore makes this week a bit chaotic as well because I am spending every free moment crafting.

My Sunday sundaze is not quite what it should be, but it could be worse. I am glad it’s not worse. A little bit of chaos is good, right? Right.

Much love on this day of rest ❤

-Ashhh

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